HomeGroups and Covenants

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Here are some thoughts on HomeGroups and Covenants

WHAT IS A COVENANT?
It is an agreement that the group comes to about the purpose and specifics of your group.

Are covenants biblical?

I found 295verses in the Bible containing the word covenant. 266 times in the Old Testament and 29 in the New Testament. Jesus Himself used it 4 verses.

God's covenants contain two especially important components: terms and duration. Although humans may reach covenants or other agreements through their own devices, God's covenants with people are usually unilateral. He alone determines the terms and conditions; humans choose whether to accept them.

Covenants are simply binding agreements between two or more parties. God Himself designed the covenant He made with Abraham and his descendants. When God makes a covenant, He will always perform what He has bound Himself to do.

WHY MAKE A COVENANT?

1. It gives your group purpose and identity.

2. It brings the group together as a team with well-defined commitments that deal with expectations and dreams.

3. It allows the needs, hopes, and expectations of group members to be known at the beginning.

4. It helps avoid misunderstandings due to assumptions about how a particular group
should function.

5. It becomes a tool to communicate this information to new members.

6. It assists the leaders of the group in carrying out their function.

7. It becomes the basis for evaluation at the end of a given time period.

8. It sets norms to which people can refer at times of conflict or renegotiation.

TYPES OF COVENANTS

1. Assumed - These covenants are allowed to happen implicitly: they are neither discussed, validated, nor written. The groups assume their covenant without working to reach a consensus.

2. Negotiated - Covenants reached through discussion are negotiated. Often, the group leader will give group guidelines for a covenant, but the group will negotiate the details together democratically.

3. Prescribed Covenants - These are covenants that the ministry leaders give to the groups. Group members join the group knowing the covenant has already been established.

INGREDIENTS OF A COVENANT

1. Goals or Objectives - Group members will have more of a sense of ownership if they have direct input into the goals and purpose of the group.

We recommend at least three:

a. To care for one another

b. To help one another grow in the ways of Jesus Christ

c. To multiply your group at some point.

2. Open or closed groups? – Most all groups agree to keep an “empty chair” at their meetings to remind them that there is someone who needs to be in the group. Should new people be added to the group at any time? Most of the time I’d say yes.

3. Covenant Length / Time Frame

4. Location

5. Frequency

6. Meeting Length

7. Childcare

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How to Win Friends & Influence Your Group

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Have you ever been given a gift from someone, it looks old like they got tired of having it around… so they “dumped” it on you? Did the thought bring you back a few years? Maybe your grandmother “gifted” you one of her old pairs of slippers, or a thing-ama-jigy that sits on a shelf and stares at you?

Many years ago I was blessed by a very Godly man who cared more about me than I did. That’s called a mentor. He gave me an old yellowed copy of Dale Carnegie’s “How to Win Friends & Influence People.” Seriously, it had a copyright of 1936 and was printed in 1982. Gee golly, thanks man. Am I that hard to get along with? I guess I was back then.

It’s a book about change. Why change, How to change. And most importantly, what you need to change. I remember the summer of that year before he gave me the book, we were all together at a Putt-Putt /swimming park. He put his arms around my shoulders and lead me to a door for the men’s locker room. He pointed to the sign on the door, it said CHANGING ROOM. He opened the door walked me in and said, “Jay…you need to change.”

Ouch. Tough love. Amazing mentor.

One of the biggest jobs you have as a Home Group Leader is to win over your group.

“People don’t care about how much you know

until they know about how much you care.”

Go ahead, read that again. The deepest principle in human nature is the craving to be appreciated.

You can be a Seminary graduate, a biblical scholar, well known public speaker, or CEO of a corporation. It don’t mean squat in the eyes of your group if they don’t think that you truly care for them or are interested in them.

The end of Part 2 in the book ends with this Nutshell, and I think it’s very valuable to you as Home Group Leaders.

PRINCIPLE 1

Become genuinely interested in other people.

PRINCIPLE 2

Smile.

PRINCIPLE 3

Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language.

PRINCIPLE 4

Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves.

PRINCIPLE 5

Talk in terms of the other person’s interests.

PRINCIPLE 6

Make the other person feel important – and do it sincerely.

Wow, that's so not normal...It sounds like words out of Jesus' mouth. Remember, your group is not about you it's about getting the people that come to it see that you care about them like Jesus does.

Equipping the Home Group Leader…

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I just finished a good book called The Equipping Church by Sue Mallory. It’s about serving together to transform lives. The church by definition is the greatest gathering of potential servants in the world, but she is the most notorious vehicle for disappointing, discouraging, and even destroying them.

A careful look at the life of a megachurch will usually quickly reveal a major emphasis on connecting people in a way that makes them feel part of something small and intimate ( as well as feeling part of something large.)

Eph 4:4 says…”There is one body and one Spirit, just as you were called in one hope of your calling; one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is above all, and through all, and in you all. But to each one of us grace was given according to the measure of Christ's gift.”

Then a few sentences later in Eph 4:11, Apostle Paul writes “And He Himself gave some to be apostles, some prophets, some evangelists, and some pastors and teachers, for the equipping of the saints for the work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ, till we all come to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a perfect man, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ."

What is a pastor, and what are their rolls? Isn't that what Paul was writing about... Well, that's not our topic here... but more importantly, If we are called to be equipped as saints by the pastors then we have a responsibility to help the pastor create one body. Small groups provide the personal touch and accountability required for healthy connection to the body of Christ. That’s where we as Home Group Leaders and Assistants come in.

Stickiness… This is what all businesses desire from their customers. What all group leaders want from their members.

We only remain the body of Christ when we stay together (Stickiness). People leave the church when they don’t connect. When visitors, members and leaders within Christ’s church drift from local church to local church without commitment, long-term spiritual health for individuals, as well as the churches suffer and serious setbacks in growth rise ( a lack of stickiness) .

Organisms rarely survive when disconnected. Bodies don’t function with breakaway members. Same with plants, trees, any form of life (except worms and jellyfish…) We must gather together to survive. Take care of each other and their needs.

This is the un-unique role of a home group. And it is lead by the home group leaders “work of ministry, for the edifying of the body of Christ” so as Eph 4:15 says, “speaking the truth in love, may grow up in all things into Him who is the head; Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and knit together by what every joint supplies, according to the effective working by which every part does its share, causes growth of the body for the edifying of itself in love.”

An equipping church measures success by the number of members who understand God’s call in their lives and finding ways to live out that call inside the church and out in the world. Pastor Rob spoke this weekend about having real faith and belief in God’s Word.

The only way we’ll accomplish this stickiness is to have people stay around long enough to grow. With that said we must lead and teach in a biblical way that promotes care and love. Do you remember The Beatles song “Do you want to know a secret? ?”

You'll never know how much I really love you.

You'll never know how much I really care.

 Listen, (do I do)

Do you want to know a secret? (do I do)

Do you promise not to tell?, Ooh oh, oh.

 Closer,

Let me whisper in your ear,

Say the words you long to hear,

I'm in love with you. (ooh ooh ooh, ooh ooh)

It’s the same with the members of a church body. We need to feel the love, hear the love, be touched by His love thru us as a body. It’s not a secret, God has given us many clues is His Word. Let em’ know they are loved and your group will have that stickiness need to hear God’ “I love you” in their lives.

A book about Grace

I'm just finishing reading a fantastic book I wanted to let all of you know about. I think it is an important read for all Home Group Leaders and Assistants. It will help you understand not only you...but the folks in your groups who are desperately seeking Jesus.

Grace - For Those Who Think They Don't Measure Up
by Bob Lenz

Get ready to explore the depths of God's acceptance.

Get ready to have your heart changed.

Get ready for grace!

This book is for those who:

• Don't understand what grace is all about.
• Know they don't deserve God's grace.
• Think they deserve God's grace.
• Reject grace and keep trying harder.
• Want God's grace but don't feel worthy.
• Believe grace is for someone else.
• Received grace but backslid.
• Live each day in God's grace.
• Want to understand the freedoms and challenges of grace.

Imagine a world where people are free to serve God and His people in response to His love. Now accept the reality of His grace and love for you, and go change the world.

Welcome to Your Newsletter.

Read it, share it among your group.

We'll be posting valuable information, upcoming event dates, thoughts, ideas, prayers to help you grow your groups internally and externally in Christ.

Click on the dates to the left of the page for upcoming events info.

To start off.... here is a great quote from Mark Batterson, Lead Pastor of National Community Church in D.C....

“I think we focus too much energy on church growth. I think it's all about personal growth. It's not about growing a big church. It's about growing big people--people who serve sacrificially, give generously, dream ridiculously, and love gracefully…

The way to grow larger is to grow smaller via small groups. I honestly don't think God will grow us beyond our ability to disciple people. And if small groups are our primary context for discipleship, then the number of small groups we have will determine our growth potential as a church.”

Wow, that really put’s an all purpose wrap around home groups. Building Christ-centered relationships that extend outside the church. Think about this… we spend 2-3 hours each week in church, maybe 15 minutes of it is actively sharing with others the rest is listening to the pastors. But in home groups, we spend 2 hours each week actively sharing and pouring into each other’s lives, making deposits and withdrawal’s into our life accounts. That is what Jesus does for us every day. That is what it means to be living IN Jesus and allowing Him to live IN us.